The Relentless March

I should be sleeping. I should be a lot of things that I'm not, but I won't go into that here. I find coffee + creativity = insomnia. I've been averaging about five hours of sleep per night for the past few years. About two years ago, I bottomed out at three. 

I should be sleeping rather than finishing up this trilogy of notes about Life at Mach Five. But life has other plans, as I find it rarely if ever goes the way I anticipate it will. I was hoping to start another productive week of work after the weekend of milestones, but again, life had other plans. 

This morning was my first physical examination since high school, and I've had nearly a perfect bill of health for most of my life. Sure, I weigh twenty pounds more than I'd like to, but I'm incredibly active and in good shape, as Roxanne and I did another three miles today. I've known that high blood pressure runs in the family, as it does with nearly 90% of men. 

What I also learned, that I could see coming is there is a strong possibility I have sleep apnea. This comes as no surprise as anyone who's ever roomed with me, hates to room with me. Alex once remarked I sound like a tornado, and his roommate at the time thought I was going to die in my sleep. 

The best description of my snoring came from Chris who told me one morning he dreamed a monster was chasing him, only to wake up from my shaking my bunk with my raucous snoring. 

If this is the case it would explain why I can't drop this last twenty pounds, (other than the fact I work a lot and haven't been able to settle into a normal workout routine for the past couple monthes), why my blood pressure was a little high, and why I can only get five hours of sleep. 

I'm not worried about losing my near perfect bill of health. Sleep apnea is very common and treatable, so I don't need to start a telethon. 

Aside from that, today was a pretty average busy day in the office, though I was greeted by the news that my awesome supervisor will be leaving us in a couple of weeks to take a job with the university. She's one of the best supervisors I've had and makes a potentially soul-draining, tedious job a joy to come into every morning, (or afternoon, depending on which other random job I happen to be working that semester.)

I believe the second hardest thing to find is a good fulfilling job in a good environment with good colleagues. I believe the hardest thing to find is a wife, but mind you I've put about as much effort into that as government has put into finding JFK's true killer. (It was Joe DiMaggio. He killed him in revenge over Marilyn Monroe.)

Over this eventful past few days, I've come to realize, life marches on at mach five, and there's no slowing it down. Three years ago, we were praying for my sister to have kids. Now we have six little feet running around the house and chasing our dogs. Someday they will meet our grandparents. And it is in the hecticness of life where the fleeting moments of synchronicity and peace that we find can find rest. 

My mentor, Will Wyatt loved to tell us we can try to take control of the circumstances of our lives, or give control the Author of Life. 

I wrote sometime ago about how we often have to sacrifice our relationships for personal growth, and we were never meant to pay the High Cost of Living, and though that is a great tragedy, the cost has already been paid.